Butterfly Cauldron
Sunday, June 17, 2007
So I have wings. . .

Since the Femiblogsphere has been driving me crazy lately, what with the Same Old, Same Old, Hair, Makeup and Marriage Last Name thing, I've been loathe to address it. Or blog about it. I read it, but I just think. . .gods, who has the energy? And then with the post Kim put up, what with the real women in real trouble bit, I'm just fed up. Seriously. If I wasn't already a feminist, I'd never become one, not in this toxic atmo. I'm understanding why so many woman don't want the name applied to them. Oy.
So, I've spent a lot of my time reading the Fat Acceptance blogs lately. And that's got me thinking about my own body, being as how it's a big fat one. I'm in love with this sundress I've found at The Avenue. It's gorgeous, it looks amazing on me and it's currently on sale. I want it. Desparately. And I don't want dresses, in general. But I want this one.
And it shows off my arms. Now, the fact of the matter is that my upper arms are not, exactly, shapely. In fact, it's not inaccurate to compare them to tiny little wings, albeit wings that will not allow me to fly. (Although, I'm thinking if any one remarks upon them, I'm gonna tell them I'm growing them out so I can fly and save on gas.) Here's the thing -- I don 't care. I genuinely do not care that I have fat arms. They're just arms. They do what I need them to do. So, they're flabby. So what? I wear tank-tops and sleeveless shirts all the time in the summer. Because it's frigging hot. It's not July yet and we've already broken records down here. It's been almost 100 fucking degrees. You know what's hot in that kinda weather? Sleeves!
So, as soon as the store opens today, I'm going to see if my dress is still there. And I'm going to buy it and wear it to work tomorrow. And I will look fricking awesome, because I'm going to feel fricking awesome. And cool. And yes, there will be people who will look at my big, fat arms and wonder how the hell I can go out in public like that. And you know what? Fuck 'em. If my fat wingy arms offend you, look somewhere else. If you're ashamed of your own fat arms, I'm sorry. But that's your problem, not mine. Don't project.
I mean, I'm shaving my pits AND my legs to wear this dress. Frankly, that's enough effort on my part. And maybe, if some other fat girl sees me out wearing my awesome new dress with my fat arms, they'll decide they can do it too. And then we can all be cool and not sweating to death together.

